A strange thing happened this week here in Ireland that’s brought up the question of home again… Where will home be? This seems to be a recurring topic in your thoughts – The question of home. Sigh… I saw someone from my old hometown… An old family friend, Glenn, who was here in Ireland touring with an orchestra/choir group from First Baptist Church in good ole’ Pensacola, Florida… I mentioned him briefly in my last post…
Seeing Glenn, especially in Ireland, reminded me of my father, which always puts me in a contemplative state… But on top of that, there were others in his group that I recognized as well… At first we couldn’t place each other from the past, but once we figured it out, it brought me back to 1996 – some 18 years ago when I’d last seen them. Whoa… Crazy running into you people all the way over here!
In 1996, at age 19, a couple years before I got into the construction industry, I was a waitress at the Marina Oyster Barn on Bayou Texar in Pensacola (it’s not as redneck as it sounds… LOL). The couple I recognized were some regular customers I waited on several times a week, for the better part of a year. OMG that time is rushing back to me… And what a tumultuous time that was in my life…
It’s strange to me, how I’m having these, seemingly random occurrences that pop up while I’m out here traveling the world that continue to bring up unexpected emotions. My Bali yogi family comes to mind, (from a previous post in May) that brought up all sorts of Key West affiliations and emotions that I hadn’t planned on… Now I’ve had Pensacola, my old hometown memories come to the surface… Some good, some not so good… And when these emotions pop up, it always makes me ponder the question of where home is/will be… Well, uhhh, yeah Eryn, that’s why you’re out here roaming the globe, because nowhere feels like home…
I’m wondering what it all means, me running into certain people… Is this God, or the universe or some cosmic force inserting these people into my journey to remind me of something? Maybe that I shouldn’t write off a home there in Pensacola? Or is it a completely random coincidence that means nothing – except for whatever meaning I give it? My one, old/new friend from the Marina Oyster Barn, Ed, said, “We ran into you for a reason. I think you’re meant to come back to Pensacola… This is no coincidence.” Hmmmm I wonder… (I’m seriously asking YOU ALL this question, about God, coincidence, the universe, cosmic force, the concept of meant to be – please comment, I want to know what you think)
Maybe Ed’s right about me coming back to Pensacola… And then again, maybe he’s not… Right now, it’s just too soon to know and I’m trying not to put too much pressure on myself to make a decision. I feel like things will naturally fall into place somehow while I’m out here on my trip and the path for my future will present itself…
I’ll always have a special place in my heart for Pensacola, and they’ve reminded me there’s a lot of love there. Even though we weren’t really close when I lived there before, it seems different spending time with them now, all the way over here in Ireland – and more like friends now than when I was that young, naive 19 year old girl waiting on them.
I never could’ve dreamt then, the path my life has taken. I certainly never thought this small town Pensacola girl would be out here traveling the world… Wouldn’t have even been an inkling of an idea at that time – or even in the slightest realm of possibility… I wasn’t strong enough then… So freakin’ strange how life unfolds – Blows my mind sometimes… It’s been a wild ride that brought me to this point, that’s for sure… But you’ve built up so much character, Eryn… LOL
As I’m making these various connections on my travels – some new, some old, some for a few brief moments and some for a lifetime, I’ve asked myself if I get too attached to people. My soul sister, Siggy and I pondered this question many times in India, “Can you love too much?” I think I’ve decided love is good in whatever form it takes… And for whatever period it lasts. I think it’s the authentic connections with people that matters most in life and brings us the greatest happiness.
I’ll likely always visit Pensacola with some regularity, with my stepmother (nice, not wicked – actually we’re very close) and several other close friends there. No doubt, I will organize a lunch with my old/new friends at the Marina Oyster Barn and we’ll have cheese grits and hushpuppies with our fried mullet, made by the very talented Mary and Eva – still going strong in the kitchen after all these years… I know my heart is with cheese grits and hushpuppies – that much I know!!!
Me and Glenn in Dublin… Crazy seeing you here!!!Ed, me and Jennifer at Blarney Castle in Blarney Ireland – we’re a long way from the Marina Oyster Barn…And here we all are after their performance at the Church of Ireland in Blarney, Ireland…
Seeing Glenn, Ed and Jennifer at first got me a little emotional and in a pensive state, but after saying goodbye and having a day or two of reflection, our newfound connection gave me inspiration to keep moving on my journey, and I bounced back to my perky self – with the help of a few jumping pictures… LOL… Always makes me laugh, those jumping pictures… I’m tellin’ ya’, if you’re having a bad day, try a jumping picture, it’ll straighten you right you! If only they could see you make these jumping pictures – Hilarious!!!
Back in 1996 one of my favorite songs was Dave Mathews Band, Dancing Nancy’s… I dreamt of futures unknown and wondered who I’d turn out to be… Turns out I’ve done ok for myself and although I’m starting my life over, and taking “The Critical Path” to my highest self, I’m emotionally, mentally and physically in the best place I’ve ever been… Thank God, Eryn, it’s been an exhausting ride!!! That song is still fitting today as I am reinventing myself at age 37… Who knows where this life-changing trip will lead me, but I know I can always go back to my hometown for cheese grits and hushpuppies.
Dave Mathews Band – Dancing Nancy’s
OH, and I didn’t forget your Sunday Postcard 🙂
As you said, no need to rush . I as others would like to see you here in P cola if only for a time. You could do the art work you told me of. Maybe a time for healings in P cola from the past, a letting go, love IS what its all about and love of self as God is showing you is the real first step! Remembering nothing is set in stone and as you have traveled in the world you can in the US. Like I told Tim, your future is BRIGHT and because you know HIM it will be given to you through HIM. Keep jumping. love g. 7/20/14
Thanks Gail… Having support from people all over really keeps me going… I’m so glad we’re in touch… YOu be well too my friend… Love you… xxoo
I think the most important part is your Happy! Once you can find happiness and learn to be happy with just “being”. “Home” is not a place or a feeling you have to have, it is a place that inspires you to be a better person and allows you to thrive. The Keys are “Home” to me, the individual people, the vibe, connection with nature and endless opportunities. I believe everything does happen for a reason, be patience the answer will appear clearly when you least expect it. It always does for me anyway 🙂 Love.Love following your journey and most of all..LOVE seeing you happy, you are glowing in all your pictures. Rock it Sista!
Thanks honey… In the immortal words of Bob Marley, “Every lil thing, gonna be alright…” Thanks for keeping up with me… If I make it back to the keys we need to hang out more!!! Love ya sista… I’ll keep on rockin’ it for ya!!!
Eryn, I don’t believe in coincidence. I believe people are put in our lives at the right time and in the right place for a reason. I call it a God thing. The tricky part is figuring out the reason and what you are going to do about it. Don’t worry girl, you’ll figure it out.
Thanks honey… It will all work itself out in time… For now I’m just happy to roaming around and seeing who pops up next… always makes the journey interesting… 🙂 xxoo
Definitely your journey is spiritual and all questions that come to you, everyone asks himself well at least once in life, I had a Tai Chi teacher who taught me anything its recipients beginning, but now it permeates my consciousness, do not always need to get an answer for everything, have to learn to live the question of a, each question has multiple answers and also change over time, with some experience with some learning may need to know the correct breathing and flow with life and what is to be a factor and do not be the result?
You are wise my friend… And I love you! Am thinking of you all over there in Israel… Be safe my dear… XXOO
Hey Eryn you are on the most amazing journey. Not only are you seeing the world you are finding yourself. The hardest thing we can do is to follow our own path with no regrets for doing so. As we follow that path we will stumble at times, run towards our future without fear and as we do so we will find the path that God chose for us at birth, but being the all knowing he has given us the obsticles that we need so that we will know which path to follow when it is presented to us. Be safe, well and do not second guess your choices because Eryn they truly are not totally yours. God bless you and guide you with his love.